Modern Love Is Mostly Marketing
On the difference between being chosen and being advertised to.
We have replaced intimacy with curation. Two profiles, two performances, two people who have rehearsed a version of themselves into something legible — and then are surprised when the relationship feels like advertising.
The vocabulary problem
We say connection. We mean exposure. We say love. We mean recognition. The categories blur because the platforms blur them, and the platforms are the medium through which most modern affection is now negotiated.
Being wanted is not the same as being known. The first is a market position. The second is a vow.
A quieter test
The test of love is not how it begins. It is how it withstands the unedited version of you — the morning, the silence, the exhaustion, the unflattering opinion. Most modern relationships do not survive this test because they were never designed to.
They were designed to be posted.
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